FREE! YOU'RE PRE-APPROVED FOR A FREE T-SHIRT BUBBA!!!
If you are the First Lucky Person cruising rt66pix.com to:
1) Actually linger on the majesty and beauty of this majestic and beautiful (plus look how nice and sharp it is!) T-shirt image:
2) Stay mesmerized long enough for the captioning to load so you can see that there's sometimes (but not always, it just depends) this literature-type thingie (you know, like words and stuff) here to deal with and maybe even read and that YOU'RE PRE-APPROVED FOR A FREE T-SHIRT BUBBA!!!!
THEN YOU'RE THE SUPREME #1 GRAND-PRIZE FIRST-PLACE "LA NUMBERO UNO" LUCKY WINNER OF A FREE T-SHIRT WITH THIS HERE ICONIC (PLUS NICE AND SHARP!) IMAGE OF A GENUINELY ROAD-KILL DEAD TEXAS ARMADILLO CHUGGING A LIGHT BEER!!!!! (Conditions apply)
(Conditions that apply: Be the first person ((whose Mama (((shouldn't it be Momma?))) actually named him Bubba)) to actually buy this here T-shirt, wear it publicly ((this means, you know, out in public)) ((DUH!)) to any place you normally go ((The Vatican, Metropolitan Opera, a hoedown)) then simply send your name and address with 38 ((or is it 83?)) forms of notarized ID ((plus an e-mailed photo of you (((wearing the T-shirt))) hugging (((and ((((most importantly)))) autographed by))) The Pope, The Fat Lady and/or Tex Ritter*)), to rt66pix.com World Headquarters!)
You do that Bubba and we'll refund your entire purchase price (minus shipping!)! You get a photo-op with all three of 'em at once, and we'll throw in an iconic, ironic, inexplicable, inexcusable, completely unique and uniquely complete (but still nice and sharp!) "We Got Worms" coffee mug for free!! (You pay only for shipping!) You'll be dipped in snuff, and standing in high cotton then! You get to keep the T-SHIRT...AND the MUG...AND they're BOTH FREE too!!!! That's like winning FOUR TIMES, BUBBA!!!!!!!!
You agree to let this photo, plus your name and likeness (whatever that is) be used in advertising for rt66pix.com!!!!! We'll even show The Pope, The Fat Lady and/or Tex Ritter* appearing to endorse rt66pix.com at no charge or obligation to them!! THAT WAY EVERYBODY WINS SOMETHING!!!!** (Void where prohibited.)
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* Tex Ritter?!
* Tex Ritter?!
** The Tex Ritter joke is hilarious if you've heard the song that inspired it. That was way back in 1961, so you probably haven't and don't get it.